So you’re scrolling your own social media feed the other day…
I initially didn’t want to share these cause I thought it weird to just repost all these memories of “on this day” over and over. Social media is such a vanity project. But I did screenshot them because I wanted to reflect on what the hell I am doing with myself at 45 years old, in January of 2026, where everyone is dreaming big again and making fresh goals for themselves, and I felt like I didn’t know where I was really going. I’ve been treading water all month trying to figure out if I’m just doing the same thing because other people think I’m “supposed to” or if I actually want to be working my ass off day & night, producing comedy shows, chasing independent film gigs, editing down podcast episodes for channels with no followers — or if I want to clear out my studio, sell everything but one good camera, and run away with my Irishly-wiccan girlfriend with all 28 of her dogs to just travel the land in my oversized camper, living a nomadic hippie life.
But vanity got the best of me, so I re-shared all these moments on my feed after all. Below are my reflections:
15 years ago I was doing some comedy with a group of fellows that have since moved away and started real lives (we were at the Caldera taphouse in Ashland, now the Local 31 Pub, where we should all get a drink next time you’re in town Scott, Dan, Benjamin Blue!)
13 years ago my friend Kristan Kelly Images shared a fun photo of me from the set of “Redwood Highway” — boom mics always look good in behind-the-scenes photos, right Gary & Anne?
12 years ago I apparently posted a sketch comedy clip that was added to YouTube 16 years ago, but filmed 20+ years ago with a bunch of homies from Southern Oregon University. They all went off and started families, bought houses, and have really good careers now (Brian, Douglas, Matt).
10 years ago, the same group of guys I had performed with at the Caldera had moved across town to put on shows at Oaktree Northwest Bar & Grill. Here’s where I first shared a spotlight with Carl Lee.
6 years ago, a movie I had helped to make with a bunch of awesome local film makers and directed by the one & only Martin Gooch (with Krista DeMille starring & co-producing), was making its local premiere here in Ashland.
4 years ago, I was featuring for headline comedian Carl Lee at the now defunct Ghostlight Playhouse (a re-iteration of the Randall Theater) in Medford, hosted by Nick Meier (of Bisky Bop Productions).
So many other great times I’ve had over the years, these were just the ones from all the “January 27ths” of social media past.
So where am I now? I’m at my work studio in Ashland, editing down a bunch of standup comedy footage from nationally known comedians (including the now ever-touring and still hilarious Carl Lee) and new comedy specials from rising regional talents. Last weekend I watched a good colleague headline at “The Warehouse” – the 3rd iteration of the above mentioned Randall Theater. I’m also editing sketch comedy commercials for a marketing client that loves my sense of humor, movie-making skills, and knowledge of the digital marketing landscape. AND, I just returned earlier this month from collaborating with the above mentioned Martin Gooch on a short film that wrapped production on January 3rd and heads out to film festivals starting on the 30th.
All these events from my past were pure passion projects. (Well, I think I did actually get a little cash from the Ghostlight show. I know Carl never works for free, so they had to offer me something – and the films were paid, low-budget, but the producers took care of their crew).
All the projects I’m working on now are paid gigs, of which I would have never had the opportunity to be doing without all the years of just following my heart.
I’ve seen the same venues change hands or change names, and keep coming back to serve live entertainment to audiences in the Rogue Valley.
I keep collaborating and working with the people that stick it out in the most unlikely of career paths, and we always do it with smiles & laughter.
I still struggle every day, questioning if I’m doing the right thing for myself, my partners in life, for my future. Every month is a new surprise of how close to breaking even I am financially by the time that last car payment goes through on the 27th (interesting that didn’t show up on the timeline).
But I look back at this kind of stuff, and all I can do is be grateful and thankful that I get to do whatever the fuck I want and enjoy the shit out of life. 
I’m no guru, but if you follow your heart & do what you truly love, I think this life is better in the end. Go have some damn fun!!
And if you want to know when the next cool thing I’m doing is (a comedy show, a movie premiere, a live performance from The Doll Pack, a kick-ass game from SO Derby, some hot band at the Talent Club I’m photographing…)
Then SUBSCRIBE to THE LEVI! (never said I wasn’t shameless)